Tuesday 24 November 2009

ARE YOU TEAM EDWARD OR TEAM JACOB?

I HAVE A confession to make. I’m in lust with someone else. Every night when my husband’s asleep, I sneak out of the bedroom to see him.

It’s his eyes that first attracted me. I love the way they flash tawny gold whenever he leans in close. Then there are the lips, stained red against his gleaming white teeth and pale skin. Whenever I look into his chiseled face I want him to kiss me.

I can’t get enough of him. I want to see him every night, but this relationship isn’t good for me. It comes with a bite.

Yes. I’m in love with Edward Cullen, the vampire with a heart from Twilight. And the closest I’ve ever actually got to him is watching the hit film on Sky movies over and over again.

It’s the character I’m in love with, not the actor. Edward is a true gentleman, an eternal 17-year-old who’s been around for over a century, and knows exactly how to treat a woman – and how to resist sucking her dry of her blood, while in a clinch. And it’s this danger that makes Edward so irresistible. 

Underneath that cool exterior there’s the ultimate killer lurking, one that’s truly dazzling. Not only does he sparkle like diamonds in sunlight, but he can read your mind (as long as you’re not called Bella) and run faster than the wind.

The actor who plays him RPattz is dull in comparison. While Edward looks like he’s hewn from the finest marble, Robert is simply pale and uninteresting.

His hair is floppy in an annoying Hugh Grant-style, and his Harry Potter accent (yes it was him in the Order of the Phoenix film!) is tedious compared to Edward’s transatlantic drawl.

Luckily, my little boy has always loved scary films. I find him scanning the sky planner for movies to make my hair stand on end, so, of course, he loves everything with a vampire in it.

I thought seven-year-old Deme was watching Ben 10 Alien Force while I bathed and put his baby sister to bed. But he’d discovered Twilight and was watching it as relentlessly as me.

So I was delighted when he spotted a poster for the latest film in the Twilight sage – New Moon – at the cinema the other day.

I’d taken him and his little friend to watch Up! in 3D but Deme was begging me to book preview tickets to see Edward as tall as a building in the cinema. Result!

Off we went on Saturday together to get our latest fix of Vampire flick. I left Alexio in charge of the baby and didn’t even have to divulge my lust for a blood-crazed Cullen.

‘Stand up straight and tell anyone who asks that you’re 12,’ I instructed Deme. ‘And no asking for Pic’n’mix until we’re through all the security.’

He’s tall for his age so no one quizzed me. And then, laden up with sweets, cola and popcorn, we settled back in our seats. And that’s where the trouble started. Yes, Edward came onscreen and was as gorgeous as ever.

But then Jacob – played by Taylor Lautner – walked into shot and all my desires for Edward were forgotten.

Wolfishly handsome, with olive skin and long, dark, hair the vampire’s love rival was buff and beautiful. He reminded me of a very gorgeous boy I kissed a lot when I was 16 and found a summer job in a tennis centre.

But it was more than that. Dedicated and loyal, you wouldn’t want to make Jacob mad. He turns into a werewolf whenever he loses control or can smell vampires. Fantastically cast, Taylor has a very rare thing – raw, animal magic.

It’s dark versus light, good versus evil, Jacob vs Edward in the battle for Bella. Of course, Edward wins – ‘it’s him, it’s always been him’ - she swoons when she’s forced to decide between them. But for me there’s only one clear choice.  Edward is sooo last century. It’s team Jacob, the living, breathing wolf boy with the brooding eyes for me.

And just to make sure, I’m taking Deme to see the film again this weekend. He loves all the action, fighting and special effects. Me? I just love watching these two beautiful characters up close on the screen while pretending I’m only going along to keep my son happy.
Which team are you on – Team Edward or Team Jacob? In case you need a reminder here’s a photo to drool over.





And yes, I know I’m old enough to be their, er, older sister, but there’s no law against looking is there? Let me know what you think? 


1 comment:

  1. No harm at all. I'm so jealous - still haven't managed to see it!

    ReplyDelete